Welcome welcome welcome to the very first blog post of this website, glad to have you here! I guess for starters, I should do a short introduction before we continue any more…

I have been writing since as long as I can remember; it has become a core part of my personality and day to day life. I do not think I could function if I wasn’t able to write. My favorite movie is either Jurassic Park or Alien, and my favorite book is Never Let Me Go. I’m an English major in college currently working on their associates degree. Also, I am a transgender woman.

Great, now that we have that out of the way, it’s time to set up what these blogs are all about. Why the hell are you reading this anyways, what use it for me to be rambling out into the world? Well, the more and more I think and stuff ideas into my head, the more I find I need a place to let them all out. So this is that. These blogs won’t always be about purely literary content, but since it consumes most of my life, it will be the majority of what’s posted here. That, along with book reviews, poetry, and updates on my upcoming novel!

To get started, let’s talk about what I’ve been reading! I’m not sure how many of you are aware of Le Guin’s work, but the book The Dispossessed has me completely enthralled. I enjoy how it both tackles the issues of a capitalistic society, while also delving into the issues a more socialistic and anarchist society might bring. It’s also interesting hopping between the past and current Shevek, who in my opinions proves to be two completely different people. I’m not finished with this book yet, but I am terribly excited to see how things progress. Just god… get Shevek some god damn therapy please.

I also find it interesting how we’re currently viewing this world through the eyes of a man, while also indirectly seeing how each world effects the women inside of it. You see on Urras how patriarchal this society is (similar to our own), and how women are simply viewed as inferior beings. They are forced to shave their heads under social pressure and wear outfits fit for the male gaze. They do work in higher education positions, nor are they allowed to attend college. They are products for the profitteers the same as anything else. Then, when we switch to Anarres, which has a more egalitarian view on gender roles. With this however we all see the stripping of identity, and further in the book the detachment of motherhood. People are often pushed to put their kids into adoption, to detach themselves from their babies, to feed into a working army of generated “unique” names. You see this both through Shevek’s mother, who makes a brief appearance, and Takver.

There’s also the difference in how sex in treated in general. In this egalitarian society there is no obvious objectification, there is no blatant power imbalance. Contrasted with the Urras society, where as soon as Shevek lands on the planet he is offered women to buy. His view of sex very quickly changes once on Urras, going from a tender and passionate man to one who craves only the simplest pleasures of sex. I think this is shown simply in a certain scene (ifykyk) where Shevek is at an impromtu house party and gets drunk, surrounding himself with people he despises. I think it’s interesting that within this patriarchal society, once Shevek meets and interacts with people like Pae and Oiie, his views begin to shift, no matter how much he detests them. You can see this clearly in the difference of how he treats Takver and Vea, two women who he seems to fancy. You cut from him wishing for something passionate and real in his youth, to someone seemingly willing to sleep with the first woman he comes into contact with. Every movement Vea makes he sees as an advance on him, perhaps because of how non-erotic the Anarres society is. I suppose you could really dig into how each of these societies view purity, which I most likely will once I finish this book.

Enough thoughts about The Depossessed, I need to actually finish it!

I think I will end each of these blogs (however often I make them) with a poem. One I am currently very pleased with is one I finished only a night or two ago. I titled it: The Seagull Who Shies away; An abhorred visage.

Oh dear, face of pale marsh.
A seagull flies over the high-tide bay.
Calling to me, a word uncoined.
Dirt under my fingernails, newly bathed.
You wish my name were thee,
Withheld from me, buried seed;
To bloom, a newborn babe.

From jagged rocks to broken teeth,
From open cove to silent charter. 
Eying the vultures circling beneath.
What they’d do to me, a barren martyr:
Keratin plucked from sinew.
Memories reborn, within, anew
So upon this deathly pit,
Will my rotten innards seem fit?

Stood upon zenith, cold water spray.
To the seagull, looming, I shall say:
‘Upon marsh, I am bathed in earthly sin.
I will die, before harsh water, I will falter; 
Upon bay stone. upon ghostly spire:
The name written is coined, and altered.’
I scream, a name I do not know,
I carve, into skin a truth I cannot show.
A postmortem eulogy, buried beneath sand.
Stood tall, the seagull takes a stand.

She perches from the blizzard’d sky,
She whispers from a place up high.
‘Matters not to the history of man’, she replied,
‘For the salty waves rush in unbothered.
The ghostly spire will join the rocks of the bay,
What you desire, hides within man’s decay;
In this forgotten mire, ghosts have no say.’